LitWiki - User contributions [en]

What is “redundancy”?

2005-04-21T16:54:45Z

Ajones: /* Redundancy */

== Redundancy ==

" A sentence should contain no unnecessary words, a paragraph no unnecessary sentences, for the same reason that a drawing should have no unnecessary lines and a machine no unnecessary parts. This requires not that the writer make all his sentences short, or that he avoid all detail, but that every word tells. If a writer fails to do this his paper may suffer from redundancy"(Grammar).

;;Redundancy causes wordiness by:
*using unneccessary repetitions,
*saying the samething twice,
*using unnecessary words,
and
*using empty clauses and phrases.

== Avoiding Redundancy ==

;; Unneccessary Repetitions
"Writers often repeat certain lines or words in their writing to captivate the reader or just for an effect; however, these repetitions may seem awkward if there is a more concise version"(Hacker,125).
"If the writer can get an effect from the reader with fewer words, the writer should" (Hodges312).

'''Example''' 1:
''Incorrect:'' Our fifth patient, in room six, is a mentally ill patient.
''Correct:'' Our fifth patient, in room six, is mentally ill.

'''Example''' 2:
''Incorrect:'' The best teachers help each student to become a better student both academically and emotionally.
''Correct:'' The best teachers help each student grow both academically and emotionally.

;; Saying the Same Thing Twice
Restating a key point in different words can help the reader understand it; however, there is no need to rephrase readily understood terms. It is redundant(Hodge312)..
For example the writer should not use words with the same meaning or connotation:
''cooperate together''
''close proximity''
''basic essentials''
or
''true fact, and etc.....''
;; Wordy Sentences
"A wordy sentence is a sentence composed of unneccessary words in attempt to convey its meaning.
When one word will do the job of several words in a sentence, the writer should use the one word"(OWL).

'''Example'''
''Incorrect:'' There well always be a person or group who will test the legislature and publish libelous statements as long as they can until they are caught.

''Eliminating "there" and "be" and putting the subject and verb in their proper place will make the sentence more concise.''

''Better:'' People will always test the legislature and publish libelous statements as long as they can until they are caught.

''Better, but there remains a repetition of the word "they." Get rid of the repetition.''

''Correct:'' People test the legislature by publishing libelous statements as long as they can.(OWL)

;;Empty Clausing and Phrases

"An empty clause is one that can be reduced to a phrase, and an empty phrase is one that can be reduced to a simply phrase or a single word (Grammar)".
''Phrases to Avoid:''
in my opinion,
in today's society, and etc....

== Work Cited ==
*Hacker, Diana. A writer's Reference. New York:Bedford/St.Martin's 2003
*Hodge, John C.. Hodges' Harbrace Handbook. 5th Edition. United States of America: Handle, a part of the Thomson Corporation. 2004
*Macon State College. Tutorial. Eliminating Wordiness.2005 <http://tutorials.maconstate.edu/owl/wp/wp40.asp>
*Darling, Professor Charles.Concise Grammar. Capital Community College. <http://www.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/concise.htm>

What is “redundancy”?

2005-04-21T16:52:06Z

Ajones: /* Introduction */

== Redundancy ==

" A sentence should contain no unnecessary words, a paragraph no unnecessary sentences, for the same reason that a drawing should have no unnecessary lines and a machine no unnecessary parts. This requires not that the writer make all his sentences short, or that he avoid all detail, but that every word tells. If a writer fails to do this his paper may suffer from redundancy"(Grammar).

Redundancy causes wordiness by:
*using unneccessary repetitions,
*saying the samething twice,
*using unnecessary words,
and
*using empty clauses and phrases

== Avoiding Redundancy ==

;; Unneccessary Repetitions
"Writers often repeat certain lines or words in their writing to captivate the reader or just for an effect; however, these repetitions may seem awkward if there is a more concise version"(Hacker,125).
"If the writer can get an effect from the reader with fewer words, the writer should" (Hodges312).

'''Example''' 1:
''Incorrect:'' Our fifth patient, in room six, is a mentally ill patient.
''Correct:'' Our fifth patient, in room six, is mentally ill.

'''Example''' 2:
''Incorrect:'' The best teachers help each student to become a better student both academically and emotionally.
''Correct:'' The best teachers help each student grow both academically and emotionally.

;; Saying the Same Thing Twice
Restating a key point in different words can help the reader understand it; however, there is no need to rephrase readily understood terms. It is redundant(Hodge312)..
For example the writer should not use words with the same meaning or connotation:
''cooperate together''
''close proximity''
''basic essentials''
or
''true fact, and etc.....''
;; Wordy Sentences
"A wordy sentence is a sentence composed of unneccessary words in attempt to convey its meaning.
When one word will do the job of several words in a sentence, the writer should use the one word"(OWL).

'''Example'''
''Incorrect:'' There well always be a person or group who will test the legislature and publish libelous statements as long as they can until they are caught.

''Eliminating "there" and "be" and putting the subject and verb in their proper place will make the sentence more concise.''

''Better:'' People will always test the legislature and publish libelous statements as long as they can until they are caught.

''Better, but there remains a repetition of the word "they." Get rid of the repetition.''

''Correct:'' People test the legislature by publishing libelous statements as long as they can.(OWL)

;;Empty Clausing and Phrases

"An empty clause is one that can be reduced to a phrase, and an empty phrase is one that can be reduced to a simply phrase or a single word (Grammar)".
''Phrases to Avoid:''
in my opinion,
in today's society, and etc....

== Work Cited ==
*Hacker, Diana. A writer's Reference. New York:Bedford/St.Martin's 2003
*Hodge, John C.. Hodges' Harbrace Handbook. 5th Edition. United States of America: Handle, a part of the Thomson Corporation. 2004
*Macon State College. Tutorial. Eliminating Wordiness.2005 <http://tutorials.maconstate.edu/owl/wp/wp40.asp>
*Darling, Professor Charles.Concise Grammar. Capital Community College. <http://www.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/concise.htm>

What is “redundancy”?

2005-04-21T16:48:39Z

Ajones:

== Introduction ==

" A sentence should contain no unnecessary words, a paragraph no unnecessary sentences, for the same reason that a drawing should have no unnecessary lines and a machine no unnecessary parts. This requires not that the writer make all his sentences short, or that he avoid all detail, but that every word tells. If a writer fails to do this his paper may suffer from redundancy"(Grammar).

;;Redundancy

Redundancy causes wordiness by:
*using unneccessary repetitions,
*saying the samething twice,
*using unnecessary words,
and
*using empty clauses and phrases

== Avoiding Redundancy ==

;; Unneccessary Repetitions
"Writers often repeat certain lines or words in their writing to captivate the reader or just for an effect; however, these repetitions may seem awkward if there is a more concise version"(Hacker,125).
"If the writer can get an effect from the reader with fewer words, the writer should" (Hodges312).

'''Example''' 1:
''Incorrect:'' Our fifth patient, in room six, is a mentally ill patient.
''Correct:'' Our fifth patient, in room six, is mentally ill.

'''Example''' 2:
''Incorrect:'' The best teachers help each student to become a better student both academically and emotionally.
''Correct:'' The best teachers help each student grow both academically and emotionally.

;; Saying the Same Thing Twice
Restating a key point in different words can help the reader understand it; however, there is no need to rephrase readily understood terms. It is redundant(Hodge312)..
For example the writer should not use words with the same meaning or connotation:
''cooperate together''
''close proximity''
''basic essentials''
or
''true fact, and etc.....''
;; Wordy Sentences
"A wordy sentence is a sentence composed of unneccessary words in attempt to convey its meaning.
When one word will do the job of several words in a sentence, the writer should use the one word"(OWL).

'''Example'''
''Incorrect:'' There well always be a person or group who will test the legislature and publish libelous statements as long as they can until they are caught.

''Eliminating "there" and "be" and putting the subject and verb in their proper place will make the sentence more concise.''

''Better:'' People will always test the legislature and publish libelous statements as long as they can until they are caught.

''Better, but there remains a repetition of the word "they." Get rid of the repetition.''

''Correct:'' People test the legislature by publishing libelous statements as long as they can.(OWL)

;;Empty Clausing and Phrases

"An empty clause is one that can be reduced to a phrase, and an empty phrase is one that can be reduced to a simply phrase or a single word (Grammar)".
''Phrases to Avoid:''
in my opinion,
in today's society, and etc....

== Work Cited ==
*Hacker, Diana. A writer's Reference. New York:Bedford/St.Martin's 2003
*Hodge, John C.. Hodges' Harbrace Handbook. 5th Edition. United States of America: Handle, a part of the Thomson Corporation. 2004
*Macon State College. Tutorial. Eliminating Wordiness.2005 <http://tutorials.maconstate.edu/owl/wp/wp40.asp>
*Darling, Professor Charles.Concise Grammar. Capital Community College. <http://www.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/concise.htm>

What is the “passive voice”?

2005-04-05T17:42:37Z

Ajones:

'''== What is Passive Voice? =='''

Passive voice is when the subject does not perform an action. It is often confused with the active voice, where the subject actually does something. For example:

'''(Active Voice)''' The professor wrote a novel.

The subject (professor) performs an action (wrote) which produces the object (novel). In the passive voice, the order of the sentence is reversed so that the sentence merely describes:

'''(Passive Voice)''' The novel was written by the professor.

'''==Recognizing the Passive Voice=='''

Recognize a passive construction by some form of the '''“be”''' (was) verb that proceeds a past participle (written), followed by a prepositional phrase (by the professor).

Diana Hacker states in her book, ''A Writer's Reference'', "forms of ''''be'''' '''(be, am, is, are, was, were, being, been)''', lack vigor because they convey no action" (128).

Another problem with passive voice is it is often wordy and less concise than active voice.

* '''Wordiness''', can cause a reader to become confused and/or lose interest in the material (OWL).

'''==When To Use Passive Voice=='''

* Passive voice can be used in technical or scientific writing.

* Passive voice can be used when what is doing the action is unknown or already well defined.

* Passive voice can be used when what is recieveing the action (or the product of the action) is more important than what is doing the action.

Example: Active
Scientists discovered a cure for cancer.

Example: Passive
The cure for cancer was discovered by scientists.

In these two examples, it is the product of the action that is needing to be emphasized, which makes passive voice a better choice for the sentence.

* Constantly using active voice can cause a paper to sound choppy. Passive voice can be used as a transition between active voice sentences to make the sentence flow better (Active).

(Note: Be selective about when and how passive voice is used)

'''== Progressive Tense =='''

'''Progressive tense''' is another type of passive construction. It occurs when you use a be verb with an the -ing form of the verb to show that action continues and is not fixed to a certain point in time. For example:

She is talking with Henry.
They were eating pizza.
She has been reading the latest Harry Potter novel.

The '''progressive''' tense is often used without thinking, but should only be used sparingly. More often than not the real verb should be used, eliminating the need for the be verb (passive) at all:

She talks with Henry daily.
They ate pizza last night.
She reads the latest Harry Potter novel every night before bed.

Notice that when you eliminate the '''progressive''' tense, you must supply a specific time for the sentence to make sense.

Like the passive voice, use the '''progressive''' tense sparingly and strategically for specific rhetorical effect. Try to eliminate all unnecessary uses of the be verb.

== Works Cited ==

* "Active vs. Passive Sentences." 2002. Academic center and the University of Houston Victoria. 22 Feb 2005 <[http://www.uhv.edu.ac/grammar/active.html Active vs.Passive Sentences]>.

* Hacker, Diana. ''A Writer's Reference''. Boston: Bedford/St.Martin's, 2003.

* OWL.2000. Purdue University. 22 FEB 2005 <[http://owl.english.purdue.edu/hadnouts/grammar/g_actpass.html OWL]>.

----

[[Composition FAQ]]
[[Category:Composition|Voice]]

What is “redundancy”?

2005-03-24T18:40:51Z

Ajones:

== Introduction ==

" A sentence should contain no unnecessary words, a paragraph no unnecessary sentences, for the same reason that a drawing should have no unnecessary lines and a machine no unnecessary parts. This requires not that the writer make all his sentences short, or that he avoid all detail, but that every word tells. If a writer fails to do this his paper may suffer from redundancy"(Grammar).

;;Redundancy

Redundancy is a common source of wordiness.
For Example:
*unneccessary repetitions,
*saying the samething twice,
*wordy sentences,
and
*empty clauses and phrases

== Avoiding Redundancy ==

;; Unneccessary Repetitions
"Writers often repeat certain lines or words in their writing to captivate the reader or just for an effect; however, these repetitions may seem awkward if there is a more concise version"(Hacker,125).
"If the writer can get an effect from the reader with fewer words, the writer should" (Hodges312).

'''Example''' 1:
''incorrect'' Our fifth patient, in room six, is a mentally ill patient.
''correct'' Our fifth patient, in room six, is mentally ill.

'''Example''' 2:
''incorrect'' The best teachers help each student to become a better student both academically and emotionally.
''correct'' The best teachers help each student grow both academically and emotionally.

"The above repetitions should be avoided" (Hacker,125).

;; Saying the Samething Twice
Restating a key point in different words can help the reader understand it; however, there is no need to rephrase readily understood terms. It is redundant(Hodge312)..
For example the writer should not use words with the same meaning or connotation:
''cooperate together''
''close proximity''
''basic essentials''
or
''true fact, and etc.....''
;; Wordy Sentences
"A wordy sentence is a sentence composed of unneccessary words in attempt to convey its meaning.
When one word will do the job of several words in a sentence, the writer should use the one word"(OWL).

'''Example'''
''incorrect'' There well always be a person or group who will test the legislature and publish libelous statements as long as they can until they are caught.

''Eliminating "there" and "be" and putting the subject and verb in their proper place will make the sentence more concise.''

''better'' People will always test the legislature and publish libelous statements as long as they can until they are caught.

''Better, but there remains a repetition of the word "they." Get rid of the repetition.''

''correct'' People test the legislature by publishing libelous statements as long as they can.(OWL)

;;Empty Clausing and Phrases

"An empty clause is one that can be reduced to a phrase, and an empty phrase is one that can be reduced to a simply phrase or a single word (Grammar)".
''Phrases to Avoid''
in my opinion,
in today's society, and etc....

== Work Cited ==
*Hacker, Diana. A writer's Reference. New York:Bedford/St.Martin's 2003
*Hodge, John C.. Hodges' Harbrace Handbook. 5th Edition. United States of America: Handle, a part of the Thomson Corporation. 2004
*Macon State College. Tutorial. Eliminating Wordiness.2005 <http://tutorials.maconstate.edu/owl/wp/wp40.asp>
*Darling, Professor Charles.Concise Grammar. Capital Community College. <http://www.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/concise.htm>

What is “redundancy”?

2005-03-24T18:36:51Z

Ajones: /* Introduction */

== Introduction ==

" A sentence should contain no unnecessary words, a paragraph no unnecessary sentences, for the same reason that a drawing should have no unnecessary lines and a machine no unnecessary parts. This requires not that the writer make all his sentences short, or that he avoid all detail, but that every word tell. If a writer fails to do this his paper may suffer from redundancy"(Grammar).

;;Redundancy

Redundancy is a common source of wordiness.
For Example:
*unneccessary repetitions,
*saying the samething twice,
*wordy sentences,
and
*empty clausing and phrases

== Avoiding Redundancy ==

;; Unneccessary Repetitions
"Writers often repeat certain lines or words in their writing to captivate the reader or just for an effect; however, these repetitions may seem awkward if there is a more concise version"(Hacker,125).
"If the writer can get effect from the reader with fewer words, the writer should" (Hodges312).

'''Example''' 1:
''incorrect'' Our fifth patient, in room six, is a mentally ill patient.
''correct'' Our fifth patient, in room six, is mentally ill.

'''Example''' 2:
''incorrect'' The best teachers help each student to become a better student both academically and emotionally.
''correct'' The best teachers help each student grow both academically and emotionally.

"The above repetitions should be avoided" (Hacker,125).

;; Saying the Samething Twice
Restating a key point in different words can help the reader understand it; however, there is no need to rephrase readily understood terms. It is redundant(Hodge312)..
For example the writer should not use words with the same meaning or connotation:
''cooperate together''
''close proximity''
''basic essentials''
or
''true fact, and etc.....''
;; Wordy Sentences
"A wordy sentence is a sentence composed of unneccessary words in attempt to convey its meaning.
When one word will do the job of several words in a sentence, the writer should use the one word"(OWL).

'''Example'''
''incorrect'' There well always be a person or group who will test the legislature and publish libelous statements as long as they can until they are caught.

''Eliminating "there" and "be" and putting the subject and verb in their proper place will make the sentence more concise.''

''better'' People will always test the legislature and publish libelous statements as long as they can until they are caught.

''Better, but there remains a repetition of the word "they." Get rid of the repetition.''

''correct'' People test the legislature by publishing libelous statements as long as they can.(OWL)

;;Empty Clausing and Phrases

"An empty clause is one that can be reduced to a phrase, and an empty phrase is one that can be reduced to a simply phrase or a single word (Grammar)".
''Phrases to Avoid''
in my opinion,
in today's society, and etc....

== Work Cited ==
*Hacker, Diana. A writer's Reference. New York:Bedford/St.Martin's 2003
*Hodge, John C.. Hodges' Harbrace Handbook. 5th Edition. United States of America: Handle, a part of the Thomson Corporation. 2004
*Macon State College. Tutorial. Eliminating Wordiness.2005 <http://tutorials.maconstate.edu/owl/wp/wp40.asp>
*Darling, Professor Charles.Concise Grammar. Capital Community College. <http://www.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/concise.htm>

What is “redundancy”?

2005-03-24T18:36:23Z

Ajones: /* Introduction */

== Introduction ==

" A sentence should contain no unnecessary words, a paragraph no unnecessary sentences, for the same reason that a drawing should have no unnecessary lines and a machine no unnecessary parts. This requires not that the writer make all his sentences short, or that he avoid all detail, but that every word tell. If a writer fails to do this his paper may suffer from redundancy"(Grammar).

;;Redundancy

Redundancy is a common source of wordiness.
For Example:
*unneccessary repetitions,
*saying the samething twice,
*wordy sentences,
and
*empty clausing and phrases

== Avoiding Redundancy ==

;; Unneccessary Repetitions
"Writers often repeat certain lines or words in their writing to captivate the reader or just for an effect; however, these repetitions may seem awkward if there is a more concise version"(Hacker,125).
"If the writer can get effect from the reader with fewer words, the writer should" (Hodges312).

'''Example''' 1:
''incorrect'' Our fifth patient, in room six, is a mentally ill patient.
''correct'' Our fifth patient, in room six, is mentally ill.

'''Example''' 2:
''incorrect'' The best teachers help each student to become a better student both academically and emotionally.
''correct'' The best teachers help each student grow both academically and emotionally.

"The above repetitions should be avoided" (Hacker,125).

;; Saying the Samething Twice
Restating a key point in different words can help the reader understand it; however, there is no need to rephrase readily understood terms. It is redundant(Hodge312)..
For example the writer should not use words with the same meaning or connotation:
''cooperate together''
''close proximity''
''basic essentials''
or
''true fact, and etc.....''
;; Wordy Sentences
"A wordy sentence is a sentence composed of unneccessary words in attempt to convey its meaning.
When one word will do the job of several words in a sentence, the writer should use the one word"(OWL).

'''Example'''
''incorrect'' There well always be a person or group who will test the legislature and publish libelous statements as long as they can until they are caught.

''Eliminating "there" and "be" and putting the subject and verb in their proper place will make the sentence more concise.''

''better'' People will always test the legislature and publish libelous statements as long as they can until they are caught.

''Better, but there remains a repetition of the word "they." Get rid of the repetition.''

''correct'' People test the legislature by publishing libelous statements as long as they can.(OWL)

;;Empty Clausing and Phrases

"An empty clause is one that can be reduced to a phrase, and an empty phrase is one that can be reduced to a simply phrase or a single word (Grammar)".
''Phrases to Avoid''
in my opinion,
in today's society, and etc....

== Work Cited ==
*Hacker, Diana. A writer's Reference. New York:Bedford/St.Martin's 2003
*Hodge, John C.. Hodges' Harbrace Handbook. 5th Edition. United States of America: Handle, a part of the Thomson Corporation. 2004
*Macon State College. Tutorial. Eliminating Wordiness.2005 <http://tutorials.maconstate.edu/owl/wp/wp40.asp>
*Darling, Professor Charles.Concise Grammar. Capital Community College. <http://www.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/concise.htm>

What is “redundancy”?

2005-03-24T18:34:08Z

Ajones: /* Avoiding Redundancy */

== Introduction ==
" A sentence should contain no unnecessary words, a paragraph no unnecessary sentences, for the same reason that a drawing should have no unnecessary lines and a machine no unnecessary parts. This requires not that the writer make all his sentences short, or that he avoid all detail, but that every word tell. If a writer fails to do this his paper may suffer from redundancy"(Grammar).

;;Redundancy

Redundancy is a common source of wordiness.
For Example:
*unneccessary repetitions,
*saying the samething twice,
*wordy sentences,
and
*empty clausing and phrases

== Avoiding Redundancy ==

;; Unneccessary Repetitions
"Writers often repeat certain lines or words in their writing to captivate the reader or just for an effect; however, these repetitions may seem awkward if there is a more concise version"(Hacker,125).
"If the writer can get effect from the reader with fewer words, the writer should" (Hodges312).

'''Example''' 1:
''incorrect'' Our fifth patient, in room six, is a mentally ill patient.
''correct'' Our fifth patient, in room six, is mentally ill.

'''Example''' 2:
''incorrect'' The best teachers help each student to become a better student both academically and emotionally.
''correct'' The best teachers help each student grow both academically and emotionally.

"The above repetitions should be avoided" (Hacker,125).

;; Saying the Samething Twice
Restating a key point in different words can help the reader understand it; however, there is no need to rephrase readily understood terms. It is redundant(Hodge312)..
For example the writer should not use words with the same meaning or connotation:
''cooperate together''
''close proximity''
''basic essentials''
or
''true fact, and etc.....''
;; Wordy Sentences
"A wordy sentence is a sentence composed of unneccessary words in attempt to convey its meaning.
When one word will do the job of several words in a sentence, the writer should use the one word"(OWL).

'''Example'''
''incorrect'' There well always be a person or group who will test the legislature and publish libelous statements as long as they can until they are caught.

''Eliminating "there" and "be" and putting the subject and verb in their proper place will make the sentence more concise.''

''better'' People will always test the legislature and publish libelous statements as long as they can until they are caught.

''Better, but there remains a repetition of the word "they." Get rid of the repetition.''

''correct'' People test the legislature by publishing libelous statements as long as they can.(OWL)

;;Empty Clausing and Phrases

"An empty clause is one that can be reduced to a phrase, and an empty phrase is one that can be reduced to a simply phrase or a single word (Grammar)".
''Phrases to Avoid''
in my opinion,
in today's society, and etc....

== Work Cited ==
*Hacker, Diana. A writer's Reference. New York:Bedford/St.Martin's 2003
*Hodge, John C.. Hodges' Harbrace Handbook. 5th Edition. United States of America: Handle, a part of the Thomson Corporation. 2004
*Macon State College. Tutorial. Eliminating Wordiness.2005 <http://tutorials.maconstate.edu/owl/wp/wp40.asp>
*Darling, Professor Charles.Concise Grammar. Capital Community College. <http://www.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/concise.htm>

Talk:What is the correct way to use punctuation with quotation marks?

2005-03-24T18:25:05Z

Ajones:

I like the style you had with the entry. Many bolded area's and bullets to grab the attention. You may want to add links to other web pages that are similar to what you wrote about. - Dave Burkert

This entry has good examples. IT is easy to understand and find what you are looking for. IT does not have a works cited.
D Davis

I like this entry. I think you should have done an example for poetry like you did with the rest of the paper.
-Amberly Keough

Helpful Information. You have a lot of information I liked how you bulleted and seperated all of your information.
-Whitney Behel

Your entry seemed to be well thought out but it needs to be put in a different order. You start out giving example phrases as tittles then you change it up and use just plain statements. You need a consistent format for how you do your entry, over all it was easy to scan for pertinent information, but you need more than two resources.
--[[User:Apitt329|Apitt329]] 13:21, 24 Mar 2005 (EST)

Great entry. You covered a great amount of information with out confusing the reader. Anthony Jones

Talk:What is a “run-on” sentence?

2005-03-24T18:21:03Z

Ajones:

A lot of great information. You need to break up the long paragraphs and add a table of contents. The information just needs to broke up in to sections. Bold and add bullets to information. You could add links to the page and put a works cited area for where you got the information. - Dave Burkert

The long paragraphs take away from the information. I do not know for sur, but I don't think we were supposed to use "I".-Amberly Keough

This entry has a huge opening paragraph. I don't think people would want to read it to get the imformation. D Davis

You need to seperate your first paragraph. You have a lot of good information, but it does not stand out because its all stuck together. I liked how you linked your sources.
-Whitney Behel

not easy to scan. need to redesign. This will make it easy to read

Condense information so that the reader can scan for the information that they will benifit from. Anthony Jones

Talk:What is “wordiness”?

2005-03-24T18:17:36Z

Ajones:

The word states (you spelled it "state's") is spelled incorrectly.Clarify, or try to simplify facts.
-Amberly Keough

Define the first list for word choice and wordiness. The point was stated clearly through the paper.
-Robert Bartosh

If you stated what wordiness and redundency are, the topic would be a lot easier to understand. Your examples were helpful. You may want to space some of the different subjects out so certain topics will stand out.
-Whitney Behel

This entry is put together well. The grammer is good. The entry is staight to the point. D Davis

check wiki to revise page. ok
daniel Epps

The entry could use a table of contents. You gave all the right info that you needed. If you use headings to break up your sections it will be more friendly to the scrolling eye.- Dave Burkert

Liked usage of lists in this one. There were a few errors to look over. Might go a little more in-depth.
-Terence Heenan

Good entry. Great organization. Minor spelling errors. Anthony Jones

Talk:What are “transitions”?

2005-03-24T18:12:56Z

Ajones:

Good so far. Be sure you are citing all of your sources and providing a section for external links. Proofread some of your sentences for clarity. --[[User:Glucas|Glucas]] 11:05, 20 Oct 2004 (EDT)

The examples could be a little clearer.
-Amberly Keough

The entry is understandable and easy to read. There are a few errors with the bullets. D Davis

great wiki. easy to read. check for mistakes
-Daniel Epps

Very helpful Lit wiki. I liked how you use a lot of bullets and headings. It made important things stand out.
-Whitney Behel

This entry is organized and to the point. Anthony Jones

Talk:What is “tone”?

2005-03-24T18:06:59Z

Ajones:

Try to make the sections a little more brief and to the point. Paragraphs of information do not catch the eye and make you want to read it, but try to bullet or bold information. These make the eye stop and read what is going on. You have great information within the wiki, but you just need to make it more appealing to eye. Think of it as you were scrolling the page quickly. What would catch your eye? Overall just need little revision.

Dave Burkert

This entry is full understandable ways of using tone in writting. The entry is also put together clearly. D Davis

Very good Lit wiki. You had a lot of information on what tone was. The examples were also very helpful. You may need to do a little revising.
-Whitney Behel

Very good article. Could not find any errors in it. Full of information and easy to understand.
-Terence Heenan

This is a good entry. It is clearly written. Anthony Jones

Talk:What is the “passive voice”?

2005-03-24T18:03:41Z

Ajones:

You may want to explain what passive voice is a little clearer. I like how you stated when passive voice should be used. That topic was very helpful. You might want to open up the first paragraph in a way simialar to how you exlpained possessive tense.
- Whitney Behel

Do something to grab the readers attention. Nothing on this paper grabed my attention while scrolling it.
-Robert Bartosh

The entry is kind of wordy. It needs to get to the point quicker.
But over all the rest of the entry is clear and easy to use.
D Davis

This entry is full of information. However it does not keep my attention. Anthony Jones

Talk:What is the difference between possessives and plurals?

2005-03-24T17:59:12Z

Ajones:

This was a well written article. I feel that all of the headings and following material for each one was a great style for it. Good job on citing the works, too.
-Terence Heenan

Very well written. The wiki site flows logically and has information bulleted and bold so it grabs the attention of the reader. Has works cited at bottom and done correctly. You could add similar web sites as links at the bottom. - Dave Burkert

This was a good entry. I think your first paragraph was a little wordy. Anthony Jones

Talk:How do I know when I need to use a comma?

2005-03-24T17:56:08Z

Ajones:

There were a few spelling errors,specifically hamster and together. Another thing is the paragraph before the eight rules could be narrowed slightly. I thought this was a good entry.
-Amberly Keough

I liked how you use the example to explain how to use the commas correctly. Check over your first paragraph you may want to re-word some of the sentences. Very helpful Lit wiki.
-Whitney Behel

This article was well written and informative. There seemed to be very few spelling and grammar errors. This entry could have used some more works to cite.
-Terence Heenan

This was a good entry. It was full of information. I think you could condense this entry to make it more scannable. Anthony Jones

What is “redundancy”?

2005-03-14T17:15:16Z

Ajones:

== Introduction ==
" A sentence should contain no unnecessary words, a paragraph no unnecessary sentences, for the same reason that a drawing should have no unnecessary lines and a machine no unnecessary parts. This requires not that the writer make all his sentences short, or that he avoid all detail, but that every word tell. If a writer fails to do this his paper may suffer from redundancy"(Grammar).

;;Redundancy

Redundancy is a common source of wordiness.
For Example:
*unneccessary repetitions,
*saying the samething twice,
*wordy sentences,
and
*empty clausing and phrases

== Avoiding Redundancy ==

;; Unneccessary Repetitions
"Writers often repeat certain lines or words in their writing to captivate the reader or just for an effect; however, these repetitions may seem awkward if there is a more concise version"(Hacker,125).
"If the writer can get effect from the reader with fewer words, the writer should" (Hodges312).
'''Example''' 1:
''incorrect'' Our fifth patient, in room six, is a mentally ill patient.
''correct'' Our fifth patient, in room six, is mentally ill.

'''Example''' 2:
''incorrect'' The best teachers help each student to become a better student both academically and emotionally.
''correct'' The best teachers help each student grow both academically and emotionally.

"The above repetitions should be avoided" (Hacker,125).

;; Saying the Samething Twice
Restating a key point in different words can help the reader understand it; however, there is no need to rephrase readily understood terms. It is redundant(Hodge312)..
For example the writer should not use words with the same meaning or connotation:
''cooperate together''
''close proximity''
''basic essentials''
or
''true fact, and etc.....''
;; Wordy Sentences
"A wordy sentence is a sentence composed of unneccessary words in attempt to convey its meaning.
When one word will do the job of several words in a sentence, the writer should use the one word"(OWL).

'''Example'''
''incorrect'' There well always be a person or group who will test the legislature and publish libelous statements as long as they can until they are caught.

''Eliminating "there" and "be" and putting the subject and verb in their proper place will make the sentence more concise.''

''better'' People will always test the legislature and publish libelous statements as long as they can until they are caught.

''Better, but there remains a repetition of the word "they." Get rid of the repetition.''

''correct'' People test the legislature by publishing libelous statements as long as they can.(OWL)

;;Empty Clausing and Phrases

"An empty clause is one that can be reduced to a phrase, and an empty phrase is one that can be reduced to a simply phrase or a single word (Grammar)".
''Phrases to Avoid''
in my opinion,
in today's society, and etc....

== Work Cited ==
*Hacker, Diana. A writer's Reference. New York:Bedford/St.Martin's 2003
*Hodge, John C.. Hodges' Harbrace Handbook. 5th Edition. United States of America: Handle, a part of the Thomson Corporation. 2004
*Macon State College. Tutorial. Eliminating Wordiness.2005 <http://tutorials.maconstate.edu/owl/wp/wp40.asp>
*Darling, Professor Charles.Concise Grammar. Capital Community College. <http://www.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/concise.htm>

What is “redundancy”?

2005-03-02T23:15:48Z

Ajones:

== Introduction ==
A sentence should contain no unnecessary words, a paragraph no unnecessary sentences, for the same reason that a drawing should have no unnecessary lines and a machine no unnecessary parts. This requires not that the writer make all his sentences short, or that he avoid all detail, but that every word tell. If a writer fails to do this his paper may suffer from redundancy(Grammar).

;;Redundancy

Redundancy is a common source of wordiness.
For Example:
*unneccessary repetitions,
*saying the samething twice,
*wordy sentences,
and
*empty clausing and phrases

== Avoiding Redundancy ==

;; Unneccessary Repetitions
Writers often repeat certain lines or words in their writing to captivate the reader or just for an effect; however, these repetitions may seem awkward if there is a more concise version(Hacker,125).
If the writer can get effect from the reader with fewer words, the writer should (Hodges312).
'''Example''' 1:
''incorrect'' Our fifth patient, in room six, is a mentally ill patient.
''correct'' Our fifth patient, in room six, is mentally ill.

'''Example''' 2:
''incorrect'' The best teachers help each student to become a better student both academically and emotionally.
''correct'' The best teachers help each student grow both academically and emotionally.

The above repetitions should be avoided (Hacker,125).

;; Saying the Samething Twice
Restating a key point in different words can help the reader understand it; however, there is no need to rephrase readily understood terms. It is redundant(Hodge312)..
For example the writer should not use words with the same meaning or connotation:
''cooperate together''
''close proximity''
''basic essentials''
or
''true fact, and etc.....''
;; Wordy Sentences
A wordy sentence is a sentence composed of unneccessary words in attempt to convey its meaning.
When one word will do the job of several words in a sentence, the writer should use the one word(OWL).

'''Example'''
''incorrect'' There well always be a person or group who will test the legislature and publish libelous statements as long as they can until they are caught.

''Eliminating "there" and "be" and putting the subject and verb in their proper place will make the sentence more concise.''

''better'' People will always test the legislature and publish libelous statements as long as they can until they are caught.

''Better, but there remains a repetition of the word "they." Get rid of the repetition.''

''correct'' People test the legislature by publishing libelous statements as long as they can.(OWL)

;;Empty Clausing and Phrases

An empty clause is one that can be reduced to a phrase, and an empty phrase is one that can be reduced to a simply phrase or a single word (Grammar).
''Phrases to Avoid''
in my opinion,
in today's society, and etc....

== Work Cited ==
*Hacker, Diana. A writer's Reference. New York:Bedford/St.Martin's 2003
*Hodge, John C.. Hodges' Harbrace Handbook. 5th Edition. United States of America: Handle, a part of the Thomson Corporation. 2004
*Macon State College. Tutorial. Eliminating Wordiness.2005 <http://tutorials.maconstate.edu/owl/wp/wp40.asp>
*Darling, Professor Charles.Concise Grammar. Capital Community College. <http://www.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/concise.htm>

What is “redundancy”?

2005-02-28T16:09:17Z

Ajones:

What is “redundancy”?

2005-02-22T04:25:54Z

Ajones:

Anthony Jones
Dr. Lucas
English 1101
21 February 2005
Subject: Redundancy in essays.
Purpose: To eliminate redundancy in essays.
Audience: Writers that have problem with redundancy in their essays.
Redundancy: Less is More
Most college essays are required to meet a minimum or maximum word count. In meeting this word count college students have a tendency to write wordy; in which they may also have a tendency to use empty phrases. They may also say the same things twice. These tendencies are associated with redundancy. To avoid redundancy the writer should eliminate wordiness, avoid saying the same thing twice, and eliminate unnecessary repetitions.
First, the writer should eliminate wordiness from his or her paper. For instance, when one word will do the job of several words, the writer should use that one word (Macon State). In this case less is better because it remove wordy sentences from the paper. In writing a paper the writer should always remember every word should count. He or she should omit words or phrases that add nothing to the meaning of the sentence (Macon State). The writer should also watch for empty or vague words such as area, aspect, element, factor, feature, field, kind, situation, thing, and type. They may signal wordiness (Hodges 313)
Second, the writer should avoid saying the same thing twice. Past experience has shown that the reader often gets distracted when the writer repeats himself or pounds the reader over the head with the information. The writer should say as much as possible with few words and keep it simple. Not many people enjoy reading the encyclopedia.
Third, the writer should avoid using unnecessary repetitions. Although words may be repeated deliberately, for effect, repetitions will seem awkward if they are clearly unnecessary (Hacker 125). If the writer can get the same effect from the reader with fewer words, the writer should. Restating a key point in different words can help the reader understand it; however, there is no need to rephrase readily understood terms or information (Hodges 312). It makes the paper wordy.
To review, avoiding wordiness, avoiding saying the same thing twice, and avoiding the use of unnecessary repetitions will eliminate the problem of redundancy in college papers. Always remember less is better when avoiding redundancy.

Work Cited
Hacker, Diana. A Writer’s Reference. New York:Bedford / St.Martin’s 2003

Hodges, John C.. Hodges’ Harbrace Handbook. 5th Edition. United States of America: Heinle, a part of the Thomson Corporation. 2004

Macon State College. Tutorial. Eliminating Wordiness.2005
<http://tutorials.maconstate.edu/owl/wp/wp40.asp